Denouement

The word, "denouement," is French.  It means the events following the climax of a drama or novel in which such a resolution or clarification takes place  For some reason I thought my 30th birthday would signify a denoument in my life.  I couldn't have been farther from the truth.  I haven't achieved resolution or clarification about anything. 

29 was a traumatic birthday for me, more so than 30.  It was the end of my twenties and I only had one year left to cling to the idea of being young and free.  I did a lot in that decade.  I graduated from undergrad and graduate school.  I moved in and out of my parents house about 8 times.  I was a vet tech, a pastry chef, and a social worker.  I lived in three different cities and figured out how to live on $80 a month.  I figured out who I didn't want to be with romantically and I figured out who I did.  I found incredible friends and I realized that some were only there for a little while. 

On the otherhand, there are things I am glad to be rid of that I did in my twenties.  Skills I acquired:  how to do a keg stand, how to play the politics of a sorority, how to drink and dial ex-boyfriends, and how to do late night last minute school projects.  There were many mornings I would stand in the shower and cringe of embarressment of whatever I did the night before. 

I wonder what my thirties will bring.  Perhaps it will bring more self-confidence and less shower anxiety.